Last year I had some serious neck and shoulder pain that caused me to miss a bunch of work and see a ton of medical professionals trying to figure out the cause of the problem. After two months of intense pain, things got better enough to function as a normal person, but even since then I have still been in some level of pain. The cause I determined is sitting in a chair all day at a desk. My pain would subside over the weekend, then gradually increase until Friday evening. It became a predictable cycle.

Being in graduate school for four years was probably the instigator of every health problem I've had since starting school. If I had known that stress would cause so many health issues I would have never pursued another degree. But once I was in the middle of it and having had suffered a lot already, I decided quitting would just add to the pain of knowing that I suffered for nothing.

My mother had systemic lupus after a period of intense stress in her life, and such autoimmune diseases have proven to be inheritable. By testing my limits in grad school, I have discovered that I may be carrying some link between stress and autoimmune symptoms. I definitely toed the line a few times. One of my roommates from college put herself through a period of intense stress in her career, and she developed alopecia. They determined it was a symptom of autoimmune illness (runs in her family also), but could not figure out how to cure it. My OB/GYN said something that I'll always remember (She's my favorite doctor): Once you reach the point of no return, you can't go back to where you were before. My mother had a severe case of lupus and I admire her for the strength she put forth in putting it into remission. She figured out that prescription drugs weren't going to help her, so she started taking a regimen of expensive supplements and changing her diet. But she still lives with the threat of symptoms returning if she puts herself under too much stress.

After being ramped up with stress for four years, I don't know how to think/feel/behave any other way. I am having to slowly retrain myself to react differently. The physical therapist who is helping me currently noticed that my adrenal cortex is in a state of exhaustion. It will take some time to reverse the damage, but I am working on this through a daily habit of taking some time out before bed to relax and meditate.

As I've mentioned many times, I have greatly reduced my intake of sugar in my diet. (Last year I eliminated caffeine.) This has helped to stabilize my moods - I used to have periods of irratibility which are now mostly gone - and reduced the level of pain I feel in my neck and shoulders. I feel really good now and it is showing when I ride strong on my bike.

It seems like everything I'm doing to improve my overall well-being is falling into place.